Friday, September 28, 2012

Poker Face

     My poker face sucks!  In fact, I do not even have a poker face. My face can always give me away - you'll know how I'm feeling because I can't hide it; and if I'm trying to hide it I usually cop out with laughter.

getting my feet sucked at by little fishies does this to my face...
Didn't even realize I was making this face, but  it fits, no? 
     Yep, whether it's uncomfortable laughter, happy laughter or 'I don't know what to say' laughter, it's my go-to to cover up for shyness, anger, nausea, irritation, discomfort... basically any emotion I have.

Pure joy doesn't look too good on my face... but here it is
     In a way this is perfect for the career I chose while in school, I was a theater major (dance minor, emotion helps out SO much in dance as well).  But the raw human, Jodi emotion usually only comes pure when I'm not under pressure or nervous, which I would assume is a general rule for most people.  You can express yourself perfectly while being spontaneous in a real- life situation, but as soon as you have to perform, you lose all of your honest spontaneity.  Well I think (hope) even under pressure, if it's a character I can really play and feel, you will get very unguarded expressions flashing across my face.  the best part is when I don;t know I'm giving myself away and people call me out on it.
A Tale of Two Cities the Musical
     Theater has helped in its own way with that though, I've gotten very good at white lying to people.  Not that I make a habit of it, but when people ask me things like 'isn't my new bf so cute' or don;t you just love this song?' I usually go with a less enthusiastic yes, or try saying things like 'I love his eyes' or 'it's got a good beat'.  So I'm not really lying, just more so avoiding the truth and covering it with a wanting in enthusiasm 'yeah..'.

Being a whore suits me, don't you think? :P
     Why do I bother blogging about these things I'm wondering now.  Well, cause I can be a lot more honest when I'm typing versus talking to someone directly.  Ideally people who want to get to know me better, the real me, can read these and learn much more about me then by actually talking with me.  Especially if I'm nervous or trying to impress you... I tend to get loud and annoying and cop out with my oh so charming facetious remarks; usually playing out in sexual jokes, references, double double entendre's and 'that's what she said' comments.

     I guess I want to apologize to any of you that have had to suffer through those moments.  I know I have some very dear friends that have had to sit through seeing me try and be flirty with a guy and failing miserably!  So I thank you all who have dealt with that! :D

 <3 always,

1 comment:

  1. I got it! When we were hanging out, you were just nervous! Lol that's what was up with all the jokes! I got it now! Lol